Testing times.

These are testing times. I'm sat in my kitchen writing this while I reflect on a week during which everything changed. Again.

While I've been making good progress in my recovery, my dear old Mum has been involved in a car accident and broke her neck. It's early days and we are all hoping and praying her healing journey can follow a similar trajectory to mine.

Last week started well. The weather was good and I went for a walk with loved ones, followed by a pub lunch in the sun. I had my Daughter overnight for the first time in 3 months and it was lovely. Spending time with her gives me such a huge lift psychologically. It was like nothing had ever happened.

On the 14th of April I was busy with life admin when I received a phone call from my Mum. Except it wasn't my Mum. It was a passer by who was at the scene of an accident and was using her phone. I went straight there to find her slumped over the wheel, being supported by an off duty nurse. I went into work mode and helped the paramedics. It was only later that it started to sink in that it was my mum on the spinal board, in a neck brace. I had a similar experience when I performed CPR on my Dad a couple of years ago.

Mum was taken to a specialist hospital and I spent the rest of the day in A&E with her. It was chaotic but I did what I could to reassure her. I stayed as long as I could and left when she was comfortable for me to go, as I had my own hospital appointment in the morning. 

Mum was moved to the critical care unit while we waited for more news from the Doctors. I had my Daughter overnight again. I didn't tell her too much about her Nanny and she provided a welcome distraction. She's got a fantastic sense of humour. It's times like that when you realise you need your kids more than they need you.

I visited Mum on the 16th and it was difficult. I don't want to go into too much detail because we still don't know the repercussions of her injury. Me and my sister managed to make her laugh a few times and she seemed in good spirits, all things considered.

I was unsure about a planned weekend away with my Partner but my Mum insisted on me going and trying to have a good time! So, on the 17th we headed off to the Forest of Dean. My Mum was on my mind a lot of the time but I was able to get updates from the hospital and from my siblings which put my mind at ease somewhat. The Forest was a welcome tonic and we had a lovely time wandering through the woods with family.

I got back today and will be visiting my Mum tomorrow, hoping to see that she's made some progress. I'm back in for Round 3 of chemo on Wednesday and it will be difficult not having my morning coffee visits from her!

I can only hope that my Mum makes a full recovery and we can celebrate navigating a difficult year together. 

"I have realities in my past, not only the reality of work done and of love loved, but of sufferings bravely suffered. These sufferings are even the things of which I am most proud, though these are things which cannot inspire envy."

- Viktor Frankl